Everybody likes bacon and chocolate. Few people like our current politicians. It stands to reason that the Bacon & Chocolate Party will sweep to victory in 2016. Who are these people? Mostly Facebook friends. Some, I’ve even met. All nice people. That’s enough for me to appoint them to important positions.
America’s Future Government
President – Paul R. De Lancey
Vice President – Candace C. Bowen
Secretary of Agriculture – Launa McNeilly
Secretary of the Crisper – Michelle Hickman
Secretary of the EPA – Lee Diogeneia
Secretary of State – Mark Kennet
Tsar of Holidays – Kathleen Smiley
Ambassador to Cote d’Ivoire – Stacy Fisher
Ambassador to Cuba – Daphne Anne Humphrey
Ambassador to Fiji – Amy Buckheister Gettinger
Ambassador to Luxembourg – Donna Cavanagh
Head of the Secret Service – Mike Allsopp
Speaker of the House – John Rucker
Bacon & Chocolate Party’s Ideals
1. Bacon is good.
2. Chocolate is good.
3. We will save our bees.
4. Car alarms suck. They’re loud, go off all the time, and they no longer serve a purpose.
5. We don’t like people who block aisles in supermarkets.
6. We like to take naps.
Bacon & Chocolate Party’s Current Campaign Chest
$0.00*
* = There is some dispute over this. Some say a person found a quarter under the sofa cushions and donated it to Bacon & Chocolate Party’s Super PAC.
Bacon & Chocolate Party’s Corporate Sponsor
HumorOutcasts Press
Visit our Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/BaconChocolateParty
– Paul R, De Lancey, America’s next president
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
You have my vote! 🙂
Thank you, would you to head a federal department or would you prefer a more modest ambassadorship when Bacon & Chocolate sweeps to victory in 2016.
Ambassadors have more cocktail parties, so I think I’ll go for that one! 😀
What country would you like? 🙂
I’m open to suggestions, but probably would want to avoid countries where consuming bacon is not considered a threat to life… 😀