The greatest threat to world peace is the Chicago Cubs. They last won a world series in 1908. Since then America has fought two world wars, and other wars while not as big as these two, still replete with distressing levels of violence.
Since the last Cubs’ last World Series win our boys have fought in: France, Belgium, Netherlands, Luxembourg, Germany, Italy, Austria, Czechoslovakia, Morocco, Algeria, Tunisia, Russia, South Korea, North Korea, China, Philippines, Micronesia, Romania, New Guinea, Indonesia, Burma, Haiti, Santo Domingo, Grenada, Kuwait, Iraq, Afghanistan, USA (against the Japanese), Japan, Somalia, Vietnam, and Panama.
This doesn’t even count all the countries where our Air Force has fought nor all of our special ops. My apologies to veterans who fought in a country that escapes my feeble memory.
But the unassailable fact remains; America has been doing a heck of lot of fighting since the Chicago Cubs last won the big one. The conclusion is obvious. Because of the Cubs steadfast avoidancel of excellence, violence stalks the globe. If ever there were a time for a global-prayer day, it is now. Pray for world peace. Pray for a Cubs Series win. It is the only way it will ever happen.
And did you know that the Louisiana Purchase of 1803 is closer to the Cubs’ last world championship than it is to present?
– Paul the Historian
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
Picking on my poor Cubs. Really?