It is your duty as an American and a peace-loving citizen of the world to say, “Your butt” to as many people as possible three weeks from now, Thursday, June 7. Here’s why:
Little kids laugh 40 to 400 times more than adults. Why? Because infantile humor is funnier than anything adult can produce. Here’s proof:
1) Crabby people go to war unless distracted by a funny joke. Sure, toddlers have problems such as having to eat creamed peas. Do they go to war? No, they say “butt” and dissolve into giggles. Do adults go to war? Sadly, all to often and often with disconcerting results. Do we tell butt jokes? Unfortunately, not very often.
2) Sure, comedians such as Jerry Seinfeld make tens of millions of dollars every year without telling one butt joke. But that just underscores how few people can tell a knee slapper without saying “butt” or even the more erudite “Your butt.” And would he even be on tv or stage without war-weary governments subsidizing him. I fear not.
So, do you fear nuclear Armageddon. Do you want to live in peace? Do you wish peace for your children? Then you must help make the world laugh. Say “Your butt” to as many people as possible and after every sentence you hear spoken.
The world thanks you.
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.