Refrigerator Pickles

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INGREDIENTS

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1½ tablespoons salt

1½ tablespoons sugar

2 cups white vinegar

2¾ cups cold water

2 pounds Kirby cucumbers of pickling cucumbers

4 teaspoons coriander seeds

10 sprigs fresh dill

6 garlic cloves

½ tablespoon mustard seeds

½ teaspoon red pepper flakes

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SPECIAL UTENSIL

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2-to-3 4-Cup Mason jars.

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Serves 6-to-8. Takes 25 minutes plus 30 hours for marinating.

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PREPARATION

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Make sure Mason jars have been sterilized. Add salt, sugar, and vinegar to pot. Cook at high heat until salt and sugar dissolve. Transfer contents to mixing bowl. Add cold water. Mix with spatula or fork. This is the brine.

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Divide cucumbers equally betweens Mason jars. Smash garlic cloves. Divide brine, coriander seeds, dill sprigs,  garlic, mustard seeds, and red pepper flakes evenly between Mason jars. Discard excess brine. Seal lids on Mason jars. Chill in refrigerator for 30 hours.

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TIDBITS

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1) Number One Son said, “It tastes nice. It tastes like a pickle.”

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2) *Beams*

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3) Lots of things taste like chicken. This is because lots of animals share a common flying-dinosaur ancestor.

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4) Chickens can fly. I believe the record for chicken flight is 243.

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5) I cannot fly at all. I am not as good as chicken.

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6) Can you imagine what football would be like if we could fly? I don’t know why the NFL doesn’t sign chickens. A chicken could fly up and swat down a field-goal attempt. I’d pay to see that.

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– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef, Ph.D.