1) Stay inside.
2) Or go outside, if you prefer. I’m not going to be dogmatic or controlling.
3) If you opt for option 2), please use an umbrella or drive with the windows up.
4) Look out the window to see if it’s still raining.
5) If it is, say, “Look, it’s raining.”
6) Wait for people in the room to say, “Yes, sure is.”
7) Binge watch TV.
8) Play Risk(tm).
9) Learn quantum physics. It’s difficult, but it can be done.
10) Take up painting.
11) Take up latch hooking.
12) Contemplate the turning points in Carl La Fong’s life.
13) Conjugate your Portuguese verbs. Don’t let this slide. You’ll never know when you’ll end up in Brazil.
14) Make whopee with your partner.
15) Nap. Catch up on your sleep debt.
16) Look at pictures of kittens and puppies on the internet.
17) Avoid surgery.
18) Stay inside. It’s still raining.
19) Contemplate the infinite while looking at the ceiling.
20) Call Carl La Fong. It’s been such a long time and he’d love to hear from you.
21) Call home. This is especially easy when you’re home.
22) Read a book while taking a bath.
23) Pretend to book a flight to Madagascar.
24) Make a machine that says, “Repeat,” over and over to any automated online menus.
25) Before going to bed, look out the window and say, “If wonder if it’ll rain tomorrow.”
– Paul De Lancey, The Comic Chef
My cookbook, Following Good Food Around the World, with its 180 wonderful recipes, my newest novel, Do Lutheran Hunks Eat Mushrooms, a hilarious apocalyptic thriller, and all my other books, are available on amazon.com.
Paul De Lancey's Blog 